I know this album is strictly commercial, but I won’t let my lead filled snowshoe get in the way of a handsome parish lady, even if her man is a Marine. But the night before, behind the door, a leprechaun had stroked it. Unfortunately the price of meat has just gone up and my 'ole lady has just gone down. You wouldn’t think I have too many since I never cared for sports, but I’m never really lonely in my excentrifugal forz. I’ll just take a drive to Beverly Hills just before dawn. And knock the little jockeys off the rich people’s lawns. Well then Fido got up off the floor and he rolled over and he looked me straight in the eye and you know what he said? "It should be easy to see the crux of the biscuit is the apostrophe. He said “it doesn’t, and you can’t, I won’t, and it don’t, it hasn’t, it isn’t, it even ain’t, and it shouldn’t, it couldn’t”, he told me “no, no, no.”
I told him, “YES, YES, YES!”
When I acquired my dad’s turntable and a handful of records (I was about 15-16) this is one of the first records I played. I brought it over to a friend’s house and we played it over and over, sometimes in slow-mo (buuuut I goooot thhhhe crystaaaaal baaaall), sometimes in reverse, because it was so bizarre and hilarious. And so perfect for a teenage boy’s sense of humor.
I listened to this record so much that just reading what you wrote reminded me of smells in the room when I listened to this about 35 years ago. No, not pot, actually - just a stinky attic.
Music can be a time machine. It works best when you play full albums on repeat at different moments in your life - in the car, on vacation, with friends, when you’re happy, or sad.
Randomly generated playlists full of music you have little connection with lack the ability to latch onto your emotions and create memories.
It truly is a fantastic album. Zappa was so far ahead of his time he’ll stay relevant long past me. What a goof and a creative genius.